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<br><div><div><span class="ecx156501613-26062011"><font color="#0000ff" size="4"></font></span> </div><span class="ecx156501613-26062011">
<div>
<dt class="ecxbyline"><font size="4"><b>New Heavy Element</b> </font>
</dt><dt class="ecxbyline"><font size="4"> </font>
</dt><dt class="ecxbyline"><font size="4">Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest
element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium, has one neutron,
25 assistant neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an
atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called
morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles
called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however,
it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes
into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that
would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years
to complete. </font>
</dt><dt class="ecxbyline"><font size="4"> </font>
</dt><dt class="ecxbyline"><font size="4">Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6
years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a
portion of the assistant neutrons and assistant deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that
Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. </font>
</dt><dt class="ecxbyline"><font size="4"> </font>
</dt><dt class="ecxbyline"><font size="4">When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes
Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium
since it has half as many peons but twice as many
morons.</font></dt></div>
<div> </div>
<div><font color="#0000ff" size="4"><br></font></div>
<div><font size="4"></font> </div></span></div> </div></div> </div></div> </div></div> </div></body>
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