[PAA-Discuss] New Heavy Element Discovered

[Rick _lux]

New Heavy Element 
 
Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest 
element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium, has one neutron, 
25 assistant neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an 
atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called 
morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles 
called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, 
it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes 
into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that 
would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years 
to complete. 
 
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 
years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a 
portion of the assistant neutrons and assistant deputy neutrons exchange places. 
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each 
reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. 
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that 
Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. 
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. 
 
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes 
Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium 
since it has half as many peons but twice as many 
morons.
 


  		 	   		   		 	   		   		 	   		   		 	   		  
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